Rain, MRT and the Comfort a Stranger

I was a college sophomore, and it was raining hard as I was heading to the MRT station. I prefer the weather as I was comfortably protected by my big blue umbrella. "My kind of day", I thought.

I looked around while the red traffic light blinked to yellow. The billboard greeted the rain with utmost pride, jeepney drivers became active shouting as more passengers waved and people were busily running away from wetness; All, except one.

She was no older than me, probably a college student in UP as well. She was silently covered by the windbreaker. She remained still despite the hard rain pounding on her damp hair and wet face.

Something inside me pushed to offer goodness. So I walk beside her and asked "Gusto mong sumukob?". I got a lot of free space in my umbrella.

She was surprised and she looked at me curiously, probably thinking that it was a pick-up line of some sort, but she nodded and settled under my umbrella. She began shaking her head and body like a wet cat. It was funny seeing someone trying to be comfortable amidst the turmoil of the busy traffic.

I introduced myself, offered a handshake but then she took my name wrongly. She said her name, and I found it hard to catch it as the rain was getting angrier. We quickly ran into the steps of the MRT station. "Hay salamat" was all she muttered.

We talked about how weird the weather was. Then I told her that she should never let herself get wet like that. She got confused with my comment, probably because we were total strangers and yet I sounded like an old friend telling her the obvious. She smiled and said "tama ka, di na mauulit"

She was a UP student as well. We talked about the usual, like the status of the colleges, the courses. We were talking as we bought the tickets and as we board the fully-packed MRT.

She seemed to have forgotten something, when she suddenly remembered and said "Thank you pala", then we both laughed at the lateness of her remark. Then I began telling her about my life, considering that it was a long travel. Strangely, I found comfort from a stranger.

Started out as a simple story about life, I led her into my memory lane. It's as if her gaze poked a hole into my secret-filled heart - it helplessly poured out memories and things I seldom share to stranger. I suddenly realized that I was hugging the conversation too much, when she began to tell her own stories as well.

I took the ride to her memory lane: from her funny childhood moments to stories about her mother, her sister and aunt - which I still clearly recall. We laughed at our conversations, not minding the small cold confinement of the MRT.

Then the speaker boomed with "CUBAO STATION". It was my signal to leave. She seemed disappointed as the MRT slowed down into a halt. She thanked me for another infinite time, and she promised not to forget an umbrella next time. I smiled and waved good bye.

We never knew each other's name and I never saw her again; Yet in that briefest moment - in that strangest rainy day, I left a happy memory in that MRT ride. I remember, looking back at the MRT as it disappeared in haste, that the market-smelled Cubao station will never feel the same.

Moving Away From Christ

I never talk about Christ in my blog, or my belief towards Christianity. I often tell people that I believe in one God and I try to detach myself with religion as much as possible. I know that people would find this principle a bit agnostic, but I still classify myself as a believer in Jesus.

There is one story, however, that I always keep inside me. A simple vision/dream/imagination/thought when I was just about to get to high school. A vision that will forever haunt me.

It was the summer of 1994, and as a part of my mom's requirement, I joined a Christian Life & Spirit Seminar (CLSS) session. I vaguely recall the speakers' speeches (although I recall an old lady reading in her speech how "Bed of Roses" by Bon Jovi was related to the devil because the title of the song was similar with the verse in the bible...hmmm), but I remember vividly the last part of the session.

The priest, who was facilitating the activity, asked everyone to close their eyes and follow his instructions. It was a simple instruction actually, nothing similar to psychiatric hypnosis. We were just asked to think of Christ.

In my thoughts, I was welcomed by a man wearing brightness. It was hard to see, the way a sun blocks your vision. But it warm and comforting. As time moves by, the man was moving farther and farther away. The brightness remains, but his figure was receding into whiteness. Before He disappeared, I asked why He moved away - and then I heard a simple answer:

It was I who moved away.

I immediately opened my eyes to cry.

How I lost the JAS game : A Jas Story

Jas, my son's nickname, stands for Julian Angelo Sandagon. He got The Julian unoriginally from his mom' name (Julieta) and my name. So last Friday night while having a Mcdo date, I told Jas the reason why he got the name. I even emphasized that the sound of the first letter of his name resonates with that of his mom's - and I told him that both our names rhyme just as well.

He was silent for a moment trying to piece things all together. Then he excitedly pointed out "Ang first letter ng name ko ay 'J'....Ang first letter ng name ni mama ay 'J'..." then he looked at me with those beautiful innocent eyes and said...." TALO KA!"

Darn, mine is 'R'.

NV : a poem

Just killing time...
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I envy silence
they won't hear hurtful words
I envy blindness
they see no painful thoughts
I envy time
it won't wait that long
I envy life
it lives
and
I envy envy
it wants more from me


for hearts to mend
for soul to heal
for life to move

stupid me: A Drawing

I never really liked my face, it's an insecurity complex to the extreme, but it's the truth somehow. Here's a tribute to the stupid me then...

Drawing done it Photoshop, Tablet and a Mirror.

Amie by Damien Rice

It's not often that a song weighs so much for an emotion to carry. This one took my memory back to silent rainy days alone. I love the ending with the violin playing the sad melodies.

Amie
Damien Rice

Nothing unusual nothing strange
Close to nothing at all

The same old scenario the same old rain
and there's no explosions here

Then something unusual something strange
comes from nothing at all

I saw a spaceship fly by your window
did you see it disappear?

Amie come sit on my wall and read me the story of Of O
Tell it like you still believe that the end of the century brings a change for you and me

Nothing unusual nothing's changed
Just a little older that's all

You know when you've found it there's something I've learned
'cause you feel it when they take it away hey hey

Then something unusual something strange
comes from nothing at all

But I'm not a miracle and you're not a saint
just another soldier on a road to nowhere

Amie come sit on my wall and read me the story of O
tell it like you still believe that the end of the century
brings a change for you and me

Amie come sit on my wall and read me the story of o
tell it like you still believe that the end of the century
brings a change for you and me

Discover Damien Rice!

Dark Knight and Captain America Sketches

Three Faces : I believe that Harvey Dent is the equilibrium of Joker's insanity and Batman's faith to justice. They "complete" each other: The black mask to the white make-up, the serious face against the maniacal laughter, the just fighting the twisted belief of human injustice. Too bad, two-face has got to decide everything over the flipping of a coin.

Photoshop and tablet w/in 1 hour.

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Captain America: The First Avenger: now that's something the cinema should crave for. This is the Marvel Universe's take on American iconography and the portrayal of America's role in world wars. This hero has been a war veteran for too long, but can he outbattle cinema sales? One way to find out.

Photoshop and tablet w/in 1 hour.